Chapter 21 Day 4 White Spectral Wind


Today is Friday, December 16th, the fourth day of the month. Day 4 is the adult male aspect of ourselves. It is day 11 of the 13 day wavespell, kin 102 of 260 days. I suggest checking these on the calendar until you get used to noticing these every day. Today is the second chakra.
So today, leave a blank for this #4 aspect of yourself. Then put Planetary North. The body part is the knees. I always thought that turned out interestingly because the adult male seems to have a much harder time getting on his knees to God, humbly. I used to have a minister who said the ladies have a much easier time surrendering to God than we men do!

On 10/28/99 Rev Absurd wrote to me: (Notice, his Birthday is Aug 11th of 1981. These aspects often wrote to me long after I had been already been integrating them).

“I am a DOER. I like to get things done! Accomplish things! Cross them off my list! Move on! I am orderly!

I am very physical. I love to be alive in the physical. I can get lost in space occasionally. When I return, I of course don’t even realize I’ve been spaced out!

I like to read and learn. I am very curious. I like to dress brightly. Yellow and red, primary WARM colors. I am quite flamboyant. Outrageous. LOVE to laugh.

I need to get plenty of attention, and need to keep a balance of NOT getting too serious.  I must live in the BIG story, the COSMIC story of the Divine Fool. That’s my home!

Being an August Clown, I am the butt end of the “white face” clown jokes. There’s something relaxing about that!”

Of course, this aspect of myself is Rev. Absurd. I wrote about how he came into me at my TAO site under History, inner clown.

He is an example of my aspect actually coming into me, and I have to integrate him when he is already inside! Sometimes, as you will see, aspects of myself introduce themselves, then let me know I am in NO WAY ready to get to know them! You will see this as my Kachina Self Woman #7, Solar West, introduced herself in the Yesod, or Solar Medicine Wheel which we will enter tomorrow.

It is so amazing to let this happen to us, because there is a realization that this multidimensional self of ours already is. We are just consciously integrating him/her into our physical body! Gradually we realize that, YES! I AM already this ADAM/EVE KADMON!!! I already am this Original Divine Creation of Source, Mother/Father God, the Creator. Before the “fall of man was”, I Am!!! I AM, IAM, I Already AM!

Image of a clam with a pearl

2-9-91 Clamentine

I am the treasure

3-10-91 Treasure


3-9-91 Peacock Feather I Am Worthy Read More

Star Miri

3-14-95 Star Miri


Here are some examples of how my left handed drawings allowed my inner child to draw THE TRUTH of what she knew about her own divinity. The Sophian Gnostics call this Divine Pride, and it must be accompanied with what they call Divine Humility.

I want to point out that this 4th day is the completion of the Planetary medicine Wheel, Malkut, East, South, West, then North.

Middle Pillar

Middle Pillar

All of these physical aspects of myself are clown beings. This is because of my personal mission. As time went on, and all the aspects of my clown selves integrated, I experienced that Miri became my main teacher, healer, and therapeutic clown self. Of course, being the most fragile, because she is my child in an adult world, she must know she is protected. Now, if I am “out in the world,” and Miri is somehow challenged or attacked, my adult woman self will come in and be my inner self at that moment. Miri will not express herself, if there is an unkind energy coming at her. And well it should be! If my adult feminine self is still in an exchange and the unfriendly energy does not recede, Rev. Absurd will step in, and do or say what is necessary. At this point of our experience of going home, I don’t force myself to deal with unkindness. I just remove myself from the scene, when needed. I pretty much know that at some level people know the energy they are giving off, and they need to be responsible for it.

I mention this, because this interaction between the planetary aspects of myself happened spontaneously when I was clowning. I even made sure that if I was doing a sensitive kind of presentation, I would ask the person in charge to be the keeper of order, safe keeper of the space. I would arrange it ahead of time. There is no way that a light bringer can be the “policeman”, too. I’ve seen clowns try that too many times. It may be a reason why clowns are feared by many people.

As I have stopped clowning in wardrobe in my elder years, I find that all these “learnings” I’ve had as a clown are transferred into everyday life and much needed for my integrated self.

The meditations for today on Divine Love, the New Energy are:

8. The unifying of the Divine Masculine and the Divine Feminine (NW)
Magnetic Medicine Wheel of the Celestine Prophecy *** chart to come.
9. Child like, innocent, pure, tender
10. Like a first kiss

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